Welcome to PLA’s Online Store. The largest supplier of PLA merchandise on the entire interweb! If you’re too lazy to drive to one of our hundreds of retail outlets across the U.S., then this is the place for you. If there’s a product you’d like to see here but can’t find, you should contact us. And if you want a PLA shirt that we no longer carry, you can probably find it at our SpreadShirt store.
 PLA: THE BOOK – $12.00 This is the PLA Book, entitled Phone Losers of America. It’s approximately 310 pages and includes many of the popular stories from phonelosers.org and notla.com, plus a few other things that can’t be found on the site. Included are stories about Dino, credit card fraud, call forwarding scams, red boxing, taking over store intercoms, Big Larry, being homeless, Curtis the Superhacker, wacky morning DJs, how to find a job, the Boulder News frenzy, eBay and McDonalds pranks, and lots more. More information on the book can be found here.
The price options below reflect the $12 book, plus shipping to your specific country. If your country isn’t listed, just choose the price that you think it will be. If you pay too much, we’ll refund the difference. You can also buy this book from Amazon.com, Barnes & Noble, CreateSpace! |
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 PLA: THE e-BOOK – $5.00 This is the PLA e-Book, entitled Phone Losers of America. Just like the hard copy version, it includes many of the popular stories from phonelosers.org and notla.com. Included are stories about Dino, credit card fraud, call forwarding scams, red boxing, taking over store intercoms, Big Larry, being homeless, Curtis the Superhacker, wacky morning DJs, how to find a job, the Boulder News frenzy, eBay and McDonalds pranks, and lots more. More information on the book can be found here.
You can also buy this book directly from Kindle, from your Nook, or from Smashwords for various other e-reader formats. |
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 PLA COLLEGE SHIRT – $15.00 These shirts look similar to a university/college style of t-shirt. The front includes the PLA Bell logo with the words “Phone Losers of America” and “EST. 1994″ which is the year the PLA began. These are professionally screen-printed shirts. To see more pictures of this shirt, click here, here, here, here and here.
PLA is no longer personally selling these shirts! All shirts have been sold and it’s unlikely we’ll ever get any new ones. Instead you’ll need to buy inferior replicas from our SpreadShirt store. The URL is phonelosers.spreadshirt.com. |
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 MECHANICAL PENCILS (PACK OF 4) – $6.00
Our pencils read PHONE LOSERS OF AMERICA “The happiest place in Roy, New Mexico!” and come in 4 colors – black, blue, red and green. You can order a single pencil, but that’s STUPID! Just buy a set of all 4 colors for $6.00 instead. |
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 GIRLY PENCILS (PACK OF 5) – $4.00 The place I ordered these pencils from had a very misleading photo, leading me to believe that the pencils I ordered would be normal, dark colors. Instead, they sent me pencils in light pastels. For only $4.00 you will receive 5 round (not hexagon shaped) pencils that read “Phone Losers of America – www.phonelosers.org – Cactus?” on them. The print is white and you can barely read it because it’s on light pastel colored pencils. You get 1 of each color, which are Girly Green, Pretty Purple, Beautiful Blue, Unitard Yellow and Peachy Pink. If you feel you’re not getting beat up in school nearly enough, these pencils should help you with that problem!
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 DOG TAG/KEYCHAIN – $7.00
PLA dog tags come in various colors and are laser-etched with the PLA logo and title on both sides. One side reads “Cactus?” and the other side reads “Cactus!” Each one includes a 24″ chain for wearing around your neck, but most people just ditch the chain and put the tag on their key ring. The tag you receive may have a different font than what is pictured here. Click here for a larger picture and more colors. If you’d like to personalize your PLA keychain with your own name instead of “Cactus?” then visit our supplier, Etch Plus, and have them make your own for a slightly cheaper price. You can use this PLA logo on their ordering page. |
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 PRANK CALL CD – CAN I HELP YOU? – $6.00 (plus $2.00 shipping)
This CD features calls by murd0c, Carlito from Madhouse Live, RBCP and The Spessas. You’ll get to hear about 73 minutes of our customer service calls from 2002 to 2012. Just a disclaimer – these calls are all available on various parts of phonelosers.org for free. You won’t be getting anything new or unavailable by buying this CD, aside from a professionally packaged CD with original artwork on it. If you want to download the full album for free, click here. You can buy the physical CD cheapest from Kunaki or you can purchase it from us with the link below. |
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 PLA VINYL STICKERS – $5.00 FOR 10 STICKERS
These vinyl stickers are 2″ in diameter. For a mere $5.00 you’ll get ten of these stickers, which will look great on all of your personal belongings. Click on the “add to cart” button to order these stickers. If you’d like to see more pictures of this sticker, then click here.
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PLA BUTTONS – 75 CENTS TO $1.00 EACH Customize your clothing, your backpack or your nipple piercings with these stylish PLA-themed button pins. Buttons are available in small 1″ sizes or larger 2.25″ sizes and there are a variety of designs to choose from. If you’d like to look at our extensive collection of PLA buttons that you can order, then click here.  Don’t disappoint your boss – Buy your 37 pieces of flair at the PLA Store! |
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