Laugh Track Matt and Slacker, hanging out together in Chicago
Here’s a Saturday night edision of The Snow Plow Show, sponsored by Devan Gladden. In this episode that was originally 3 hours and 10 minutes, we explore a brand new intricate tunnel system underneath a rich neighborhood, we launch a cyber attack on an innocent family business, and we amuse a family that’s going on a cruise tomorrow.
Nichole is forcing me to go through with my dumb Talking Prank Victim Clock idea. It’s going to be a webpage that has nothing but a live clock on it. A talking clock that announces the time in the voices of angry prank victims saying things like “Do you realize it’s 5:15 in the morning?” and “12 o’clock in the fuckin’ midnight.” What I need to get it started is time stamps of specific shows where prankees angrily announce the time for us. Or better yet, mp3 files of prankees angrily announcing the time. If you want to contribute, you can send either of those things to email@example.com. And once it’s finished, we’ll get to work on the talking prank victim clock app for iTunes and Android.
I’m pretty sure that angry message electrocuted and killed a man each time I rang it.
Contribute to the I Phreak Alone video. Here’s a link explaining the project and what scenes are needed. Don’t send anything after April 10th though. Or maybe the 11th. Or the 12th if I get really lazy this week. I’m hoping to have the video done this weekend though.
This is the last week that you can by Bonecage’s album, which features creepy stalker voicemails by me. He’s taking it down forever after this weekend. So quick, order it while it still exists. All that’s a lie though, he’s not really taking it down. But get it anyway. To trick him into do more things for us.
The ending song was With You by I Fight Dragons. If you say it all together it’s like “I fight dragons with you.” I wonder if that was intentional.
So remember way back in 2012 when PLA once again completely re-invented prank calls by asking listeners to put notes on cars that read, “Sorry I dinged your car!” with my phone number on it? And remember all the hilarity that ensued whenever the car owners would call me, pretending that they were cops or attempting insurance fraud by acting like there really was something wrong with their car? Remember when that guy yelled at Carlito for kicking his Audi or the time Laugh Track Matt sucker punched Samantha in the face?
Now you can relive the glory days of car ding prank calls by listening to this brand new album of old prank calls! Sorry I Dinged Your Car contains over an hour the very best car ding calls. Completely edited and remastered in digital stereo, these 17 tracks are guaranteed to make you happy that you don’t take your car or your life as seriously as the people in these calls do. This album contains calls by Samantha Clarkzilla, Tristan Brunsdon, NotBrad, Triquel, Carlito, Laugh Track Matt, but mostly RBCP.
How much would you expect to pay for a gem like this? $25? $100? $600? Make sure your heart medication is nearby, because we are giving this album away absolutely FREE. That’s right, it’s FREE! Right now, you can download the entire album for nothing at all by visiting phonelosers.bandcamp.com.
What’s that? You say you like stupid archaic technology like compact discs? You say you like filling up your home with useless plastic crap? You’re a hipster that walks around with a Sony Discman, listening to the greatest hits of the 1940′s? Well then this deal just keeps getting better and better because you can buy a physical copy of this amazing new album for five bucks. No, you are not hallucinating, you can actually get this album on completely outdated technology from the 1990′s for just $5.00. If you’re in the United States.
If you’re in the U.S., PayPal $5.00 to firstname.lastname@example.org. If you’re in Canada, make it $10.00. And if you’re anywhere else on the planet, better make it $15.00 total, because those international shipping rates are insane. (If it’s considerably less money than $15.00, I will refund some of it and change the price on this page.) This special offer is only good until May 31st, 2014, so hurry the fuck up. After that I’ll probably make these CDs $45 or something.
This show is sponsored by Dustbunz! I stole the show title from Nemt. The images above are from Derreck. If you think you can make better Snow Plow Show Low Gows that I might turn into a sticker soon, then give it a try and email it to email@example.com and you will get absolutely NOTHING in return for your efforts. Except maybe a sticker. Or 2 stickers. Make sure you make the image large and uncompressed.
In this evening edition of The Snow Plow Show, RBCP was nice enough to spend 3 hours editing out all the ringing phones and awkward silences from the show, bringing the total running time to just 1 hour and 48 minutes. It was originally 3 hours. YOU’RE WELCOME. This is the premiere Snow Plow episode on the brand new Prank Call Nation Network Machine!
MUSIC: The Lick Your Own Butthole Party Dance by Rappy McRapperson
Bonecage is releasing a new album on April First. Go preorder it at thebonecage.bandcamp.com (I shortened the song in the podcast edit – it’s a bit longer than that.)
The voicemail on the end was left a couple hours after the show ended. My voicemail claims I’m a tree service, so that’s why he’s talking about trees. He’s one of the Yelp checkin people from the show.